Will Trusting God Teach You How to Stop Worrying?

Here are two quick questions to check if this article on how to stop worrying is for you: Do you feel renewed by the Lord, walking in faith, or are you tired and worn out as you strive to please him? Is there a difference between trusting or pleasing God?

As you search for how to stop worrying, you may ask yourself this question, addressed so eloquently in The Cure: What If God Isn’t Who You Think He Is and Neither Are You by Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John S. Lunch.

Is it better to work hard at pleasing God or to focus on trusting God?

Of course, when you read that question you may remember Romans 3:23, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23, NIV) or perhaps the more direct phrasing of Isaiah 64:7, “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away.” (Isaiah 64:7, NIV).

Reading these, you may think that you do not work hard at pleasing God and that you trust Him to ensure the words of your mouth and the meditation of your heart are pleasing to him (Psalm 19:14). Yet, once you trust the Lord are you are even more motivated to work hard to please him? The authors explore this tension which is helpful to understand as we examine the theme of worry.

The story is part teaching, part allegory, and starts with a traveler who comes to a fork in the road of their life. One fork points down one road which is characterized by trusting God, and the other points to a path and a life of pleasing God. As the authors write:

“I look up at the Trusting God sign. This has to be a trap, a trick question. It sounds good, but it doesn’t give me anything to do. It’s too passive. How will I make a difference? If God and I are going to be in sync, there’s got to be something more than trust. If the issue is me, I’m probably not going to figure out my destiny simply by trusting God. So I set off on the path of pleasing God.” – Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John S. Lunch

The traveler then comes up to a building with a banner across the front with the words: “Striving hard to be all that God wants me to be.” Entering through the door labelled Self-Effort they find themselves in The Room of Good Intentions. Inside this opulent room, the traveler is surprised to see everyone wearing incredibly beautiful masks, similar to the one the traveler is given.

The authors describe the room as a place where each person is doing just fine. They are all serious about working on their sin and trying to keep God pleased with them so that they can achieve an intimate relationship with God. There is an unspoken message in the room, which is that God loves you always, but he likes you a lot less when you make mistakes.

The traveler finds that he comes up to standard on most days, he remembers to read his Bible, pray for others, and also read some popular Christian books. He realizes that while he gains satisfaction from doing these tasks, he knows that his thoughts disappoint God. He notices after a while no one in the room knew what he looked like behind the mask, and despite his sincerity, he believes he has never pleased God.

The authors write:

“The comfort I felt when I got here is fading. I’m carrying this tension, like if I don’t measure up, I’ll be shunned… Despite all my passionate sincerity, I keep sinning. Then I get fixated on trying not to sin. Then it all repeats: Same sin, same thoughts, same failure.” – Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John S. Lunch

Exhausted from bluffing and faking like he has it all together he slips out of the room tired and discouraged. He walks back until he comes to the fork in the road. Feeling like there is nowhere else to go he strikes out on the path of Trusting God.

This time the path leads him to a building, and the banner across the doorway reads: “Living Out of Who God Says I Am.” He enters and comes to a door named Humility where, exhausted, he collapses and prays: “I’m so tired, I can’t do it. Help me… I’ve fought so hard to impress You, and none of it did. Now I’m weary, empty and alone. I’m tired of performing. I’m tired of pretending I cannot please You by any amount of effort. Help me God!” (Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John S. Lunch)

The man then opens the door and finds himself in the “Room of Grace.” Struck by how less impressive it is when compared to the “Room of Good Intentions,” he immediately recognizes that it is also far more inviting.

He is welcomed into the loud conversation ranging throughout the room, but instead of masks, he sees sincere smiling faces characterizing the participants in this room.

He notices the people in the room are messy but honest. Discussing their struggles, they do not pretend they have it all together, and the unspoken understanding of the room is that God is delighted with you regardless of how you behave. The people in the room believed that God likes and loves them all the time, even when they make mistakes.

The traveler slowly starts to become comfortable in the room and to tell the truth about themselves. To his surprise the fictionalized character discovers God is right there in the room and, with an arm around him, God says He is big enough to handle all the person’s sin. God explains that their sins do not surprise or shock Him and can never come between God’s love for him.

God tells the man that he loves the man more than words, even on his worst day. God instructs the man to trust His definition of who the man is and to let other people love him despite them knowing that he makes mistakes. And through trusting God and receiving the love of others the man was able to love others because he knew what it was to be loved.

The authors write:

Pleasing God is a good desire. It just can’t be our primary motivation, or it will imprison our hearts…When our primary motivation becomes trusting God, we suddenly discover there is nothing in the world that pleases Him more… Pleasing God is not a means to our godliness. It is the fruit of our godliness, for it’s the fruit of trust…They’re trusting who God says they are, instead of adding up their behaviors to prove their godliness. – Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John S. Lunch

Can trying to please God make you worry more?

As we work hard to please God we often look to change from who we were into what we should be. Trusting God is different. As Christians, we grow into who we are already – righteous and made right with God the moment we believed.

As you continue your journey on how to stop worrying, read through these questions to help show you which path you are on:

• Do you measure your relationship with the Lord by how few times you sin, or by the truth that Jesus loves you?
• Do you see yourself as a saved sinner or a saint who still sins?
• When you speak with God, do you spend more time rehearsing your failures or enjoying His presence?
• Which strikes a chord – messages that tell you that you’ve not done enough or those that remind you who you are so that you are free to live out the life God has given you?
• Do you believe that one day you will please God, or are you convinced that you are already pleasing?
• Do you trust in habits and self-discipline to make you strong, or grace?
• When reading the Bible does your interpretation veer toward accusing statements such as you ought, you should, why can’t you, when will you? Or rather as accepting and encouraging?

These helpful scriptures relate to the idea of pleasing or trusting God, and will provide insight into how to stop worrying as you trust Him:

Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in God’s sight by the works of the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of our sin. But now apart from the law the righteousness of God has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. – Romans 3:19-23, NIV

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 6:23, NIV

For I can testify about them that they are zealous for God, but their zeal is not based on knowledge. Since they did not know the righteousness of God and sought to establish their own, they did not submit to God’s righteousness. Christ is the culmination of the law so that there may be righteousness for everyone who believes. – Romans 10:2-4, NIV

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. – Ephesians 2:8-9, NIV

Which path are you on? Which path do you want to be on?

Christian counseling for how to stop worrying.

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