7 Personal Development Tips for Self-Growth

I think we can all agree that our goal in life should not be to coast through and blend into the background. We want to experience self-growth and thrive in everything that we do – professionally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.

Maybe you dream of traveling the world, writing a book, raising seven children, being a foster parent, going skydiving, receiving your Ph.D., starting your own business, becoming a first responder, and saving lives, winning the CrossFit Games, or taking risks and learning new things.

I think our mindset in everything we do and dream of doing has much to do with constantly growing and evolving and not remaining stagnant or stale in how we approach people and tasks.

In marriage, our goal should not be just to stay married but to love being married to our best friend. It is constantly getting to know them and growing as a couple. It is having inside jokes and dreaming big together. It is working through disagreements and becoming stronger through the rough patches.

In a career, our goal should not be just to make money but to remain passionate and put our heart and soul into whatever we are doing. It is constantly evolving, learning, and trying to see things from a different perspective.

In parenthood, our goal should not be just to keep the little humans fed and bathed, but to make memories that we will all hold near and dear to our hearts for the rest of our lives. Parenthood is laughter, dance parties, and tickle fights.

Parenthood is asking for forgiveness, reading bedtime stories, and making a fort in the living room together. Parenthood is teaching your children about Jesus. Parenthood is when your heart turns to mush when your children pray on their own for the first time.

In our faith, our goal should not be just to attend church, but to tell others about Jesus, grow in the fruit of the Spirit, know our spiritual gifts, and be eager to share our faith. Growing in our faith is learning more about our Savior, being quick to forgive, and constantly growing in grace.

In life, our goal is not to fit in or fall into the crowd. Our goal is to be the person who can find beauty in the mundane. Our goal is to make memories in the smallest of moments – like a dance party with our children in the carpool line at school. Our goal is to develop a love for lifelong learning and not to remain stagnant in whatever we are doing.

“Develop a passion for learning. If you do, you will never cease to grow.” – Anthony J. D’Angelo

7 Tips for Self Growth

Here are some steps to consider as you are constantly growing and improving in all areas of your life:

1. Learn the value of life stories.

To consistently grow and evolve personally, spiritually, and professionally, it is helpful to learn the value of life stories. To be vulnerable and share your life story can help someone else in their journey. To listen and value the life stories and lessons of others also help one learn the value of empathy, different perspectives, and the beauty of supporting one another in this journey of life.

The ultimate life story comes from Jesus Christ and His Word. The Bible is our road map regardless of where we have been and where we think we are headed. God’s plans are far greater than anything we could ever imagine for ourselves.

The Bible tells us how to love others, how to respond with grace, how to ask for forgiveness, and how to find hope amidst the gloomiest of seasons. Hebrews 4:12 reminds us, “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

2. Practice active listening.

Someone once said that “The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.” The art of communication is often overlooked because our minds have 500 different tabs open as we try to converse with someone.

It can be easy to plan a response or think of what we are doing next that we forget to absorb what people are saying. Sometimes we need the reminder to pause, listen, soak in the conversation, and then respond with grace.

Becoming an active listener can change the course of friendships, marriages, and work environments. Communication should not be one-sided, rather; we can glean so much wisdom from listening to the words someone is saying, but also noticing their body language. What if someone says they are okay, but they are trying to choke back tears? Watch, pause, listen, and be open to what the Holy Spirit is trying to show you.

3. Practice deep breathing and relaxation techniques.

Too often, we become knee-deep in anxiety because we tend to overcommit and overwork ourselves. We forget the value of pausing and allowing our minds and bodies to reset and refresh.

For your mental and spiritual health, you must take time to talk to God, read His Word, journal, and practice deep breathing and relaxation techniques. Find time to breathe out the chaos of the world and absorb a rekindled passion for life and others.

It was once said that “Rest is a weapon given to us by God. The enemy hates it because he wants you stressed and occupied.” Rest, rejuvenate, spend time with God, and allow for a mental and spiritual mindset so you can start your days strong.

4. Establish healthy habits.

Wayne Dyer gracefully said, “Healthy habits are learned in the same way as unhealthy ones – through practice.”

A healthy lifestyle is not one that just happens, it is one that is learned. To take care of your body and soul, you must be willing to establish habits. If you want to take care of your body, then you need to drink water, exercise, eat healthy, and practice relaxation techniques.

To take care of your spirit, you must spend time with God, read your Bible, have an accountability system, and not be afraid to ask for help.

5. Know when to ask for help.

One of the biggest lessons someone can learn, regardless of their age or social status, is the importance of a support system. Whether it is a spouse, friend, parent, co-worker, or neighbor – asking for help is imperative in every phase of life. Calling out to God when you feel weak and defenseless is one of the greatest lessons a person can learn and put into practice.

Here are some verses that remind us that God is always close – in the bountiful seasons and the weary seasons:

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. – Isaiah 41:10

If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power forever and ever. Amen. – 1 Peter 4:11

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. – Isaiah 40:29

6. Do not let things fester.

To thrive in life, we must be willing to trust, communicate, and learn to continue moving forward. To move forward, we must be willing to trust God in the driver’s seat of our life when things are going well, and when things feel like they are falling apart.

When a project fails, when fear gets the best of us, when we are anxiously awaiting potentially life-changing results, or when someone says something that hurts our feelings; it can be too easy to hold onto that hurt. It can be so easy to hold on to fear rather than try to trust God.

We cannot let our past pain, turmoil, and let-downs fester. We must be willing to pick up the shattered pieces of our hearts and hand them to Jesus. He is the ultimate fixer. He can do more with a willing heart than a world-renowned artist can do with a blank canvas.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. – Psalm 147:3

It does not matter how broken you feel or what haunts you from your past – He is greater!

7. Do not let fear drive your life.

It can be so easy to live in fear. You may want to write a book, but you are afraid of how it will be received. You may want to audition for the praise team at church, but you are afraid that you do not sing harmony well enough or might not be as seasoned as the other singers.

You may want to start a business, but you are afraid of what your mother will say. You might want to talk to your spouse about something that haunts you from your past, but you are afraid of how they will respond.

Lead with love. Lead with God-confidence. Do not live in fear, but live trying to trust God, continue learning, and continue growing outside of your comfort zone.

Remember that “Everything you’ve ever wanted, is one step outside of your comfort zone.”

To continue growing and thriving, we must be growing in empathy, growing in our relationship with others, learning new skills, trying new things, and trying to trust God to help us navigate whatever lies ahead.

Individual Counseling for Personal Development

If you are looking to continue growing, thriving, and finding new ways to trust God outside the walls of your comfort zone, then scheduling a counseling session today may help you establish a healthy plan to continue moving forward.

Talking through your fears or working through whatever is haunting you from the past are key components to moving forward and living your best life. Today is your day – today might be the start of a new chapter.